Honoring myself this Mother's Day....

In years past I have reached out to friends without children, infertile and not infertile, to wish them a Happy Mother's Day.  To thank them for their love, nuturing, compassion, advice, laughter and more they have provided to me and so many.  More and more I realize these unsung women (and men) make this world a better place.

But this year, I also decided to turn the love lens on myself and honor what I bring to this world, too.  If you know me, I have a very hard time seeing the good in myself or talk lovingly to myself.  It's an ugly scar left over from infertility and a one time broken marriage.  I can easily push myself to the brink, try to fix every small error I've ever made or correct every flaw I see in myself and carry Olymic gold winning amounts of guilt and shame.

But this year, I choose to acknowledge myself for being one of those wonderful women, too.  I hope you'll do the same.  So here goes:

I am proud of my role as a stepmother.  My stepson knows I love him, that I would do anything for him but also completely respect the role his mother has in his life.  I also have done and still do a lot to keep the peace between his biological parents.  During my infertility journey, my faith has been shaken many times and I have come to accept some prayers don't get answered.  However, I think life will rise to meet you if you let it.  My stepson didn't deserve to have divorced parents any more than I didn't deserve to not have biological children.  But maybe life knew we would need and love each other and made sure our paths crossed.  And I am grateful every day for being a stepmother for the last 9+ years.  (11 since we started dating.)

I am proud of my role as an aunt.  My nieces and nephews come to me with their problems, joys and questions and know they will be met with honesty, respect and have their best interests at heart.  I have spent many years attending their activities, taking them places and having them over.  They are some of the best time investments I have ever made.

I am proud of my role as a daughter.  I am there for my parents when they need me and even when they don't.

I am proud of my role as a wife.  I have stood by my man when I stood alone.  We have worked hard to bring our marriage back from the brink and we have a deeper, stronger and sometimes funnier relationship than ever before.

I am proud of my role as an entrepreneur and business partner.  I am an attentive, honest and hardworking vendor to my clients.  I am a grateful, detailed and quick paying client to my vendors.  I am trusted and loved by my business partner, being supportive in business and in life. 

I am proud of myself for not giving up on myself.  This was a hard thing for me to do but I did it.  I would love to hear what you love about yourself - because I know you are fantastic, too!

Comments

[Foxy]

Oh Yes, You are one incredible amazing beautiful brilliant loving compassionate creative and giving woman. Yes, Yes you are.

[myinfertilitywoes]

I absolutely LOVE this post. You are incredible, Lily. The world is better for having you in it, and I know my life is enriched for knowing you.

I'm sorry you've had a difficult road. I love that you are now in a place to be able to honor yourself for all the amazing things you do & are to yourself and to others. You are a special soul.

Thanks for being you and for allowing us to share in your specialness. :)

[Karen]

Lily I am proud to call you friend. You are so brave and inspirational. You own your truth and that is a beautiful quality.
Xo. Karen

[Sharyn]

You are fantastic,my dear Lily. I am forever better having met you.

[Lisa]

Love the courage you showed by posting this!! YES we should all celebrate ourselves a little more and not feel any guilt about it! Thanks for the reminder.