Welcome ICLWers! I'm still a bit of newbie to ICLW but I thought I'd give it another go because each time I meet interesting bloggers - maybe this time it will be you!
So, here's a little infertile breakdown on me, since most people want to know that first:
- 2 pregnancies, one on Clomid
- 2 early miscarriages, one D&C
- 1 complete marriage breakdown after MC #2 but somehow came alive again amongst the ashes
- 2 therapists, one to deal with the marital issues and another to deal with the infertile issues to prevent more marital issues. Both were amazing and I can't thank them enough for seeing me through some incredibly tough times.
- 1 injectable cycle with IUI, failed
- 1 woman who had to move on from trying to conceive in order to regain her sanity and place in this world (and doing pretty great, actually!)
- Led a Resolve Support Group, which was amazing but emotionally draining (If you haven't been, definitely go to a meeting at least once.) Met some cool infertiles there like kick-a** Fertility Foibles - she's an amazing gal!
- Occasionally write an Infertile Comic
- Started an Infertility E-Class to help other infertiles deal with the emotions of infertility (next one is in October and it's free, if you want to join us...)
- Wrote a little book called Infertile Inspiration (Check it out in the left hand column)
The other thing about me that I really don't talk about much is that I am an infertile .... stepmom. I think I feel a little weird about it when delving into the infertile world (and fertile world actually - nobody aspires to grow up and be the Evil Stepmother character, now do they?). I feel like because I do get to enjoy a very real version of parenthood (my stepson has been in my life since he was 2 and he's turning 13 this week) that I shouldn't be sad, angry or disappointed that I didn't have biological children - that it somehow insults the love I have for my stepson.
I also think most people around me don't really realize I'm infertile or haven't thought about it much because I am so close to my stepson and very involved in his life and get along well with his actual mom. Having a stepson sometimes makes it easy to hide behind my experiences with him and not be forced to address all the other experiences I will likely never have from a pregnancy and a baby.
I guess my stepson is top of mind tonight because this weekend we're having his 13th birthday party with my husband's family and all his cousins. (There are a lot of them and I happen to spend a lot of time with my nieces and nephews, too.) I decided to make mini cupcakes for his party on Sunday. I'm far from Martha Stewart but I think it will be a fun touch to the festivities. We made a test batch earlier in the week and they got my stepson's seal of approval (even if he hates when I talk about how "cute" miniature cupcakes look). So, tomorrow, I'll be in the last place most people would ever look for me...baking in the kitchen.